The World Sees Me Differently

The world sees me differently:
Valiant, mirthful, carefree.
My eyes are filled with laughther,
with joy, with solace, and with grace.
But behind all these are the pains
of brokenness, of betrayal, of rejection,
of frustration, and of distraught.

The world sees me differently:
They see a Knight of Flowers,
a noble boy of blemish-free life.
A boy whose intentions are pure,
a boy who delights in everything simple,
whose ecstacy has extra cheese.
Yet amidst all those smiles, all those smirks,
all those giggles, and all those cheers
are the cries of a boy who just lost a friend.
The cries of a boy who is lost,
lost in a world of pretense and make-believe.

The world sees me differently:
Strong, independent, steadfast.
My armor shines brightly,
conquering not only my present darkness
but those of others.
My spirit of independence inspires others
to carry on and be not afraid.
But my armor is made of lies,
and that spirit has long withered and died.

The world sees me differently
from who I really am:
A knave of flowers.
Frail.
Just like a flower that’s fated to wither.
Broken.
Just like an armor that has gone through
many battles and can no longer take another.
Dissonant.
Just like the sound of a laughter that’s filled
with tears of pain and longing.

But when the world asks me if I am doing fine,
I would always say, “Of course, I’m okay.
I’m always okay. I am the King of Okay.”
And this is why the world sees me differently.