your bad habits

i was your bad habits . . .
the things you knew you shouldn’t have been doing
and yet you have done them anyway.
i was the sleepless nights you’ve had—
tiring, demanding, regretful, yet indulging.
i was those episodes of binge eating—
impulsive, consuming, unreasonable, yet satisfying.
i was the lies you told your families—
the class outing, the study out sessions, the parties.
i was the absences you had from school—
the family emergencies, the sudden come-ups, the unforeseen occurrences.
i was the tardiness you had at work—
the sleeping in, the traffic, the sickness.
i was the time off you had from your friends—
the “i’m busy,” the “i cannot make it,” the “i am not in the mood.”
i was you bad habits . . .
something that you enjoyed so well until you noticed my toll.
i became the reason of your indiscretion—
the insecure thoughts, the doubtful feelings, the vengeful curiosity.
i became the root of your unhappiness—
the restrictions, the suspicions, the constant checking.
like all bad habits, i became taxing—
i caused exhaustion, pain, and fatigue.
i was your bad habits . . .
and then you knew better,
and you decided to quit.

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